A drunk in a bar pukes all over his own shirt, which was brand new before he came in. "Damn" he says, "I puked on my shirt again, if the wife finds out, she's gonna kill me."

"Not to worry", says the bartender as he sticks a 20 dollar bill in the drunks pocket. "Just tell her someone puked on you and gave you some cash to cover the cleaning bill".

So the drunk goes home and tells his wife about the guy who puked on him. She reaches into his pocketand finds two 20's. "Why are there two 20's?" she asks.

The drunk replies, "Oh, yeah, he crapped in my pants, too."