Both rant and looking for advice

[07Negative]

So I've been going back and forth with the woman of the house about moving out of Cali. I personally just can't take it any more and its been a long time coming.
She's also bugging me to get married and have another kid. As is we have a 2.5 year old girl and a 3 year old rottweiler. I actually don't believe in marriage. I'm one not religious. I think its an insult to religion for non believers. Nor am I one for government. So to me marriage is either a fundamentalist based thing or government related.
Why do women want to get frickin married? Whats the point, really?
My other gripe is more humans is not a good thing. I wish they would put birth control in the water already. Mainly aimed at all the stupid people having kids.
So do I just do this marriage thing and call it a day or what?
Hopefully I didn't offend anyone, but I wouldn't be surprised if I didn't.

[Brasscatz]

Well, there is a lot more to marriage than religion. There's the commitment written on paper. Plus, you get perks for being married, like discount on your auto insurance lol. You file taxes jointly, and you can ruin each other's credit!

Bottom line is, Do you love her? Do you want to spend the rest of your life with her? If so, having that ring on y'all's fingers will be the closest to a guarantee that you can get. Why not get married? She wants it. You personally will feel the same if you are married, you won't love her any less.

If religion is what's keeping you from doing it, you can be married in your own back yard by a friend that gets ordained or something, doesn't have to be a preacher/minister in a church.

And to your question of "what's the point?" I ask you, what's the difference? If you consider your relationship a "forever exclusive" thing, then why not make her happy? It won't change anything for you.... plus, you make momma happy, then the chances of her making you happy get just a little better than before ;)

[Brasscatz]

Oh, about the kids thing.... unfortunately, there's no way to prevent stupid people from reproducing, so we need enough smart people to reproduce so we can counteract the others :P

[4.3LXJ]

DeeJay, the kid thing I can understand. I only had two. My philosophy is that we need zero population growth. That means every breeding couple should only have two kids, and I would be happy with a policy of one child like in China. I thinks it is completely stupid to keep pumping out kids hoping for that one boy or girl. Be happy with whatever comes out and if they have all the body parts that is even better. As far as marriage goes, that piece of paper is a real brain teaser. Aside from religious and political considerations, it is a form of relationship security for women. We men don't feel the same constraints. But psychologists that do this type of thing have determined that in the pecking order of what women want in a relationship, security is number three on the list. And that includes financial as well as relational. So, she is just being a woman. And it is a serious thing for them as well.

[Rocco83]

My ex-fiancé decides to hit the road when she realized I got snipped on my 21st birthday as my present to myself. I can't stand peoples children and never wanted any myself.

I'm not big on the institution of marriage either. If she can't take my word for it that she's the only one then I don't see why a piece of paper would be all that much more satisfying.

I guess really you have to decide if she's worth losing or not depending on how fanatic she is about wanting to get married.

It is hard once you have kids in the mix to think about. To me they are like handcuffs, some people enjoy them though I guess.

[07Negative]

The other thing about multiple kids is that I already work 7 days a week. If someone can add another 3 days into the week so I can afford it, great. How the hell do people afford to retire, put kids through school & college. Even though I'm not all that confident in college degrees. They should be called financial institutions. I can't even afford to have a damn hobby!
The lady keeps talking about schools. California public educational system blows something hard. I'd rather homeschool the kid(s). I really don't like living here. I need a trip back home.
Thanks for the input folks. I should have gotten my junk snipped wicked young too.

[Rocco83]

It may be from growing up an only child, but I'm stingy and selfish when it comes to my money; but I didn't want kids to take up my money. I saw how my parents struggled a bit while I grew up making sure I had no wants. After I graduated high school they were able to do the things they wanted. Was lucky enough to get an academic scholarship.

I didn't want to go through the same problems they had. I'm also a little upset about overpopulation and what we are doing to our planet. That is a different discussion for another time though.

I understand keeping your lady happy, but not at the expense of your own happiness. We have one life to live, make sure it is worth it.

I don't envy you being in Cali. I love my guns too much for that :)

[07Negative]

It's more than just guns here. Taxes are phoking out of control. They want to do a carbon tax next and this proposal is nuts. We got crap like AB 327 on electricity. Rent for a 2 bedroom apartment is $2700. I work 13.6 miles away it took my 47 minutes to get home. Cops here are freaking power trip like crazy. Berkeley liberals are some of the worse kind. I can't walk 10 feet without having someone ask me for money. There are people EVERYWHERE! I take 20 shits just to get away from ppl. The violence is out of control! We are currently the #1 place for theft. Right now in my work neighborhood we've had 5 strong arm robberies. For once I'd like to be around white folks. I have to keep my car registered in a different county b/c it's $75 more b/c the county I live in has a bunch of low life's. a dozen eggs are $7! Which is dumb as shit! I have to pay the city I live in for having a dog. We have career politicians that keep getting elected someone. I mean really. Who in gods name keeps voting for Diane Frankenstein? 22 years in office & she's the wealthiest congress person. I wonder how? Ppl drive like shit here. Not a few. But a good 40% of them. Or how about how inhabitable SoCal is but yet there are ppl in drows there wasting resources. Somehow we are getting a high speed train costing billions. That goes from one shit hole to another shit hole. But we have seriously ****ed up roads. It is now $46 a unit at a local JC. I can seriously go on & on. The pay here is crap too.

[Rocco83]

The pay where I am is absolutely terrible. BUT, I have 5 acres of woods and 90 acres of farmland that I got for next to nothing. You can rent 5 bedroom/3-4 bath farm houses out here for 400-500. Little to no crime. Our school systems are excellent. I'm the only minority in about a 20 mi radius. Taxes aren't bad. Roads are good and there is no traffic. Cops here are always on power trips as well though. My closest neighbor is over a mile away. You can get farm fresh eggs about every other house for a dollar a dozen.

Didn't want to rain on your parade. Just a little plug for Ohio if you're looking for places to move to. Great place to live as long as you don't mind large plains of corn fields with 0 elevation or things to look at. Unless you're in southern Ohio. They have hills, but more inbreeding. Trade offs :P

[cantab27]

leave the mrs and young one and buy another jeep...there sorted...

[Rocco83]

leave the mrs and young one and buy another jeep...there sorted...

lol wow. If only life was that easy.

[07Negative]

leave the mrs and young one and buy another jeep...there sorted...

I'm more inclined to get a few more Rottweilers. I'd probably buy a Toyota next. Unless I can find a SJ.

[cantab27]

lol wow. If only life was that easy.

was ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,:D,,,and life is easy

[07Negative]

I'm from Iowa. We have plenty of corn fields. You got 90 acres for cheap? How'd you manage that? I want to go back to farming. I miss it. Only thing to farm here is pot.

[Rocco83]

I'm from Iowa. We have plenty of corn fields. You got 90 acres for cheap? How'd you manage that? I want to go back to farming. I miss it. Only thing to farm here is pot.

Land out here is pretty damn cheap usually. With a lot of the older farmers dying off and all their kids living in the cities and not wanting to deal with farming anymore you can pick it up at a good price. I'm really banking on them making it legal to grow pot out here someday. It already goes so well out in cornfields as it is, full fields of it will be glorious and worth so much more than the usual rotation of crops now...

It is great though seeing all the DEA helicopters in the summer and early fall making their passes over trying to round up everyone's pot.

[Firemanray]

Wow some of you guys have a whole different outlook on kids than I. I have 2 (boy and girl). I love every minute with them, never even noticed what they cost me either. Now my son is 17 and loves to wheel so I always have a wheeling buddy that goes on my schedule. Been married 27 yrs, the thing I like best about my marriage is absolute trust, you can't find that much any more.
Marriage and children aren't for everyone, it's good that some folks realize this before they screw someone else's life up. Go with what makes you happy, just be sure you are truly happy.

[07Negative]

You can smell pot in the air here on a regular basis. I do have to say Cali houses some of the best cannabis breeders. And beer brewers. We can grow hemp now too. It all gets sent to Canada for processing though.
There are tons of helicopters flying around looking for that stuff too. More so up north. Humbolt's entire economy is relied on cannabis.

[Rocco83]

Wow some of you guys have a whole different outlook on kids than I. I have 2 (boy and girl). I love every minute with them, never even noticed what they cost me either. Now my son is 17 and loves to wheel so I always have a wheeling buddy that goes on my schedule. Been married 27 yrs, the thing I like best about my marriage is absolute trust, you can't find that much any more.
Marriage and children aren't for everyone, it's good that some folks realize this before they screw someone else's life up. Go with what makes you happy, just be sure you are truly happy.

I admire that and people who truly do love kids and whatnot. Just not my thing. I always thought I would be that cool uncle that spoiled my cousins kids and did things with them...Turns out I truly dislike children, really really dislike them. My mother always wanted grandchildren and still resents me for never giving her any and not having the ability to now.

I really can't even do relationships anymore. Women always jet when they find out that I want nothing to do with kids. Thankfully I'm at peace with that and have no problem spending my time without a permanent fixture around the house.

Congrats on 27 years though. Too many people my age give up on marriages when times get hard and take the easy way out. I just turned 30 and a lot of my friends have been divorced already. Glad to see people sticking it out. You would think people would find out whether or not they could live with someone before they get married and end it before that big commitment.

[drakan1908]

Me and my wife lived together for year before we were married. That was 32 years ago. We have 2 boys now 30 and 24. All that is great but the best thing is GRANDSONS!! I have 2, one is 9 and the other is 5 and they love Jeeps and offroading. Life is good.

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[slvmart]

Just one 23 yo son, the only 1 was not by choice, just the way it turned out. Meaning it would have been more kids if it would have worked out. It was hell at times, but now well worth it. All I can say about kids, if they are a problem, is never give up but never give in.
As far as the wife, didn't really have to stick with anything. After almost 33 years, it's been great, with a few bumps, but nothing major.
The right combo makes a world of difference. Sort of like the right suspension gets you what you need in your XJ. And I agree, trust is everything. But you only get what you put into it, if she's the right one.

[Mudderoy]

So I've been going back and forth with the woman of the house about moving out of Cali. I personally just can't take it any more and its been a long time coming.
She's also bugging me to get married and have another kid. As is we have a 2.5 year old girl and a 3 year old rottweiler. I actually don't believe in marriage. I'm one not religious. I think its an insult to religion for non believers. Nor am I one for government. So to me marriage is either a fundamentalist based thing or government related.
Why do women want to get frickin married? Whats the point, really?
My other gripe is more humans is not a good thing. I wish they would put birth control in the water already. Mainly aimed at all the stupid people having kids.
So do I just do this marriage thing and call it a day or what?
Hopefully I didn't offend anyone, but I wouldn't be surprised if I didn't.

I look at it as a respect issue. Respect to the woman, or man, and for the child(ren). Children often feel divorce are their fault, so I think it makes sense that if their parents aren't married they may feel they really aren't that important.

These are just general thoughts, individual actions make a big difference.